| Author |
Message |
|
Austinholic_3:16
|
 Posted: Wed Apr 08, 2020 11:46 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:28 pm
Cash on hand:
217,587.75 
Posts: 31641
Has thanked: 26 times
Been thanked: 65 times
National Flag: Canada
|
5 years at the job, and yesterday i finally took a shit at work. absolutely terrifying experience and one i wish to never have again. Maaaan, i dun flushed more extra toilet paper down work toilets than anyone, makin cushions of TP on work toilet seats. Gruber say im a pussy for not bare assin a work toilet fuck you, call me a pussy! na fuck that, you had it right from the jump. except for your absolute willingness to drop bombs in public. i cant man. but i had no choice yesterday. shit was coming out and i couldn't fight back as hard as i tried. Believe me I dont drop public bombs unless clinchin my ass is on the verge of absolute failure. One of the worst feelings in the world, having to take a shit to the point of being completely incapable of holding it back. its like nothing in the entire world matters except that battle with you and your asshole!one of the truest things ever said. its terrible. 
|
|
  |
|
 |
|
Austinholic_3:16
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 12:16 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:28 pm
Cash on hand:
217,587.75
Posts: 31641
Has thanked: 26 times
Been thanked: 65 times
National Flag: Canada
|
|
ive never realized how much i love the art of being inebriated until i had a deadly disease hanging over my head. its pretty extraordinary.
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 12:52 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
 |
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
ive never realized how much i love the art of being inebriated until i had a deadly disease hanging over my head. its pretty extraordinary. Aint it great though? I have a group of ppl I play some ps4 games online with. Ran into them earlier off the night shift, put some ice in a glass at 730am and started going at the brandy, and it was honestly a fuckin time and a half of laughs and gaming! Slept at 12. Woke up at 8pm for work, lil headache, but fuck it, shit was beautiful! _________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 1:06 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
I missed the first part of this because I was busy winning the 2020 MLB Show CHIP!  But yo, me Anis gotta talk about shitting at work bro, sounds like we cut from the same cloth, and I've got some pretty crazy fucking experiences. _________________  How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 5:01 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
DaTruth wrote: I missed the first part of this because I was busy winning the 2020 MLB Show CHIP! But yo, me Anis gotta talk about shitting at work bro, sounds like we cut from the same cloth, and I've got some pretty crazy fucking experiences. Fake ass champ Now is a good a time as any to get some kind of BHO gaming Tourney going. Baseball, Football, Basketball, all 3, whatever the fuck. _________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Austinholic_3:16
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 9:17 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:28 pm
Cash on hand:
217,587.75
Posts: 31641
Has thanked: 26 times
Been thanked: 65 times
National Flag: Canada
|
I missed the first part of this because I was busy winning the 2020 MLB Show CHIP! But yo, me Anis gotta talk about shitting at work bro, sounds like we cut from the same cloth, and I've got some pretty crazy fucking experiences. I always believed you could do it. congrats man.  bruh i felt like Finch in American Pie. im panicking looking for the seat covers and it took me to the 3rd one to get it on right cause the first 2 ended up in the water. then the overwhelming relief of finally letting the bomb out, mixed with the overwhelming fear of someone entering the bathroom. never again i hope.
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 10:45 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
For years, knwoek d close enough that I could jump in a train and go home and take a shit, and that's what I did. Or, if I knew I was hanging out late night in the city, I'd just wait for everybody to leave and then just blow the bathroom the fuck up, with full and complete privacy after confirming there were no cleaning people on the floor.
Sometimes, those plans don't work out. A... Forget about that paper shit, I never was able to finger it out, I wipe down the seats, and then be sure to go double time when I shower.
Anyway. I work in NJ and live in NJ now, the drive is 40 minutes, no way I cna do my NY thing and go home to take a quick shit in the heights and then back to work on the A train. Them days is gone.
So the other day I had to hits the bullet. I couldn't hold it, it felt like it had taken control of me and the shit was basically giving me mad warning signs... Like nigga you laugh... I'm coming... Nigga you cough, I'm out... So I said fuck it... Let's go...
I go in, someone sitting on the stalls... I went back out, lingered, a few people came in and out and finally the nigga taking a shit came out, I rushed in cup in hand because I can't wipe my ass with dry paper, I'm used to wetting the toilet paper, fill up the cup with water, someone comes in to take a piss, I wait them out, and hit the handicap stall.
Quick wipe...
Sit... Bombs being dropped. Sounding like a fucking automatic rifle off on that bitch, I hear the door crack I flush to announce my presence. They take a leak, they leave, drop more bombs, more automatics being let off... Repeat Cycle... Cup on floor full of water, I'm ready to wrap this up.... I notice the toilet paper looking slim, and I used up a huge load just wiping the seat down, and this is going to be fucking close.
I'm down to my last fucking piece of paper, look down and I still got shit being wiped so I can't fucking call it quits. I'm sitting in this motherfucker while people are coming in and out and I have no fucking toilet paper. I text my girl and my brother and my brother is practically throwing a party on thr family chat, my girls is hurting with me, but she can't help.
I waited for the bathroom to empty out, pants at my ankle, do the shimmy walk mad quick to the next stall, someone comes in, I got my cell, my wallet, and my cup in the other stall, I'm fucking praying this motherfucker didn't come in here for a shit, he didn't, takes a piss, bounces, I shimmy walk back to the stall, the nerves got to me so bad I dropped more bombs, but this time I had a full roll to work with.
Never again bro.
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 11:15 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
DaTruth wrote: I rushed in cup in hand because I can't wipe my ass with dry paper, I'm used to wetting the toilet paper,
 Fuckin Diva. Might as well carry around baby wipes mang. DaTruth wrote: ... I notice the toilet paper looking slim, and I used up a huge load just wiping the seat down, and this is going to be fucking close.
I'm down to my last fucking piece of paper, look down and I still got shit being wiped so I can't fucking call it quits. I'm sitting in this motherfucker while people are coming in and out and I have no fucking toilet paper. I text my girl and my brother and my brother is practically throwing a party on thr family chat, my girls is hurting with me, but she can't help.
I waited for the bathroom to empty out, pants at my ankle, do the shimmy walk mad quick to the next stall, someone comes in, I got my cell, my wallet, and my cup in the other stall, I'm fucking praying this motherfucker didn't come in here for a shit, he didn't, takes a piss, bounces, I shimmy walk back to the stall, the nerves got to me so bad I dropped more bombs, but this time I had a full roll to work with.
Never again bro. _________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Austinholic_3:16
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 11:36 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:28 pm
Cash on hand:
217,587.75
Posts: 31641
Has thanked: 26 times
Been thanked: 65 times
National Flag: Canada
|
yea you better off just using baby wipes.  but yea even with using the seat cover i went home an hour later and worked my ass over with soap relentlessly.
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 11:03 pm |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
|
I tried to fuck with Coronas, but i went to the grocery store today, and they aint have ANY, like they was sold the fuck out!!! So I bought Stella, I aint tryna go into another fuckin place and risk getting CORONA tryna buy Coronas I have more sense than that.
But my idea of buying Corona beer was obviously not that Original!!!
Anyway, 3 beers in!!! And playing Dead By Daylight on PS4 with one of my hoes!
_________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Austinholic_3:16
|
Posted: Thu Apr 09, 2020 11:20 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:28 pm
Cash on hand:
217,587.75
Posts: 31641
Has thanked: 26 times
Been thanked: 65 times
National Flag: Canada
|
I tried to fuck with Coronas, but i went to the grocery store today, and they aint have ANY, like they was sold the fuck out!!! So I bought Stella, I aint tryna go into another fuckin place and risk getting CORONA tryna buy Coronas I have more sense than that.
But my idea of buying Corona beer was obviously not that Original!!!
Anyway, 3 beers in!!! And playing Dead By Daylight on PS4 with one of my hoes! https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nytime ... r.amp.html
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2020 8:47 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
When the Hennys in the system.... Aint no telling... Uhhh.... Baby baby...
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Austinholic_3:16
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2020 9:29 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:28 pm
Cash on hand:
217,587.75
Posts: 31641
Has thanked: 26 times
Been thanked: 65 times
National Flag: Canada
|
|
damn bruh you love Henny. what else you drink??
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Fri Apr 10, 2020 10:09 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
damn bruh you love Henny. what else you drink?? I'm from the bottom. What don't I drink....what you wanna rock with... I got vodka, conac, whisky is my specialty. _________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 12:20 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
|
My brothers! I am checking in! Whiskey on the rocks, with a bit of ginger ale!
_________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 12:34 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
In da zone
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 12:58 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
In da zone Wha u on, and how deep u in it? _________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 9:45 am |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
Got stuck watching Ozark. Was doing Henny on the rocks.
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 9:00 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
It's flowing and the Cristo is lit.
Fuck with me
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 9:52 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
Ladies and gentleman...
Uh...
I'd like to thank ya for joking me...
Uh..
Wifey made lasagna and dropped a platen on the kitchen floor... She's fucked up too..
Yea...
But we don't run...we stand and fight...
I will be going to Brooklyn on Sunday.. And hold on because the driver of thr mission has arrived....
I.... Am.... Back..
Masks and glove...
Fu K with me
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 9:55 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
I'm so fucked up right now.
Who's getting fucked up.
Who's getting stupid? Let's get retarted
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
DaTruth
|
Posted: Sat Apr 11, 2020 10:33 pm |
|
Joined: Sun Apr 06, 2014 12:02 am
Cash on hand:
62,719.80
Posts: 4326
Has thanked: 2 times
Been thanked: 7 times
|
|
Ya not rolling with da Brooklyn n boy?
_________________ How I feel after failing the Anis test
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 12:32 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
DaTruth wrote: Ladies and gentleman...
Uh...
I'd like to thank ya for joking me...
Uh..
Wifey made lasagna and dropped a platen on the kitchen floor... She's fucked up too..
Yea...
But we don't run...we stand and fight...
I will be going to Brooklyn on Sunday.. And hold on because the driver of thr mission has arrived....
I.... Am.... Back..
Masks and glove...
Fu K with me  _________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 12:34 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
|
Other half the bottle of johnny init right now...and im lookin to crack the bottle of Gin on my wall....
_________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Jermzhi
|
Posted: Sun Apr 12, 2020 1:08 am |
|
Status:
Offline
| Site Admin |
|
Joined: Sat Apr 05, 2014 8:14 pm
Cash on hand:
254,579.90
Bank:
26,272,933.85
Posts: 32664
Has thanked: 38 times
Been thanked: 63 times
National Flag: Jamaica
|
|
Wha u mean lasagna mang? Ya wifey italian? Yall dont got no Boriqua Dominican easter dishes mang? I aint eating anything outside of yardie food this weekend bruh.
_________________
|
|
| |
|
|
|
Points
